Guiding Light in my life

Based upon the request of someone, I compiled all of the posts from this blog into a word document. I categorized them as best I could and corrected a spelling mistake here or there. As I look through the introduction, I noticed how much had changed. The ages of my other children had moved up a notch. I was no longer at the same job or in the same industry. Also I noticed that it stated that “my daughter had passed away last summer” This was no longer accurate since, Nechama died almost a year and a half ago. I changed it to say”the summer of 2004.” Upon reflection, I realized that her passing became an official date. It was slightly less of a blur and more of a reality. Nechama has been my guiding light, certainly, since her death. She has been my constant motivation in everything in life. It is an amazing phenomenon how someone can be such a significant part of your life yet the void hasn’t lessened in any way.  The feeling of being separated is as strong as ever. The wound is still so raw and the pain so real. Yet Nechama remains the propelling force in every part of my life. Because of her I feel that I cannot go on but because of her I can’t stay stagnant. Nechama was such a special person and each day that goes by causes my recognition of her greatness grows stronger. Nechama was truly a Gadol in the true sense of the word. I hope that people will learn from and be inspired by her example as I have.