Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Speech at Siyum

This is the speech that was given at a siyum which my 10yr son and I made in memory of Nechama.

Over the last year, I’ve had multiple opportunities to speak about Nechama in a variety of forums. However, in many ways and on many levels, this is perhaps the most difficult. Today's gathering consists of a small, intimate group of some of our closest friends and family. My words today are intended for the youngest of the group. Namely Mordechai….., Miriam……, Chaim and baby Shimon.

Today 's occasion is marked by 2 events for our family. One makes us feel happy and one may make us feel sad. It is a day of remembrance for Nechama Liba who we miss so much. And it is also a Siyum for which Mordechai and I finished Mishnayos Pesachim, which gives great joy and nachas to Mommy and I. The 2 events are connected since Mordechai and I have dedicated our learning together as a zechus for Nechama Liba.

. The last several years have had their share of difficult moments but we need to remember the good times that we had.

As the head of the household, perhaps all questions are directed at me and somehow I am supposed to provide sufficient answers. My response is that everything depends on the questions that are asked. We were not put on this world to ask questions of why and how could, only of what…… We need to ask ourselves what can we learn from Nechama………

Mordechai, Miriam and Chaim, There are many things that we can learn from Nechama. We can learn from Nechama how to always be happy and do mitzvos with a smile. We can learn from her, to serve Hashem bSimcha even in the face of very difficult challenges. We can learn to be teachers. We can learn that even a young child can make a tremendous impact on the world. We can learn that we should make friends with kids who don’t have many friends. We can learn to be brave. We can learn to make the best of a difficult situation. We can learn to be an inspiration to other people even if we are young.

In many ways you have already done these things. But we need to continue to do them and internalize them and make them a permanent part of who we are. By learning all of this things and by doing them, we will forever be connected to Nechama Liba. Our family as well as the people in this room will never forget Nechama. And I am sure many others will remember her as well.

Mordechai, by learning mishnayos for Nechama, you have done the greatest thing that you could for her. Mordechai, your learning of Mishnayos gives tremendous nachas and happiness to Mommy and I and to everyone here. Your Rabbeim, family and friends are so proud of you and the person that you have become.

Your determination to finish Pesachim, even at 6 in the morning is an inspiration and an example for everyone to follow. I look forward to finish many more maschtos with you starting with Shekalim.

Mordechai, Miriam and Chaim, as you grow older, you will understand Nechama in new ways. You will recognize on a deeper levels, what an incredible person she was. And she will never be forgotten. The best thing that we can for Nechama is continuing to do Mitzos and learn Torah for her and for ourselves. I am sure that Nechama is in Shemayim next to the Keysay HaKoved with Hashem and that she continues to daven for our entire family.

Thanks to our closest friends and family for always being there for us and supporting us when we needed you most.

Like we learnt in the Mishna that explains, how that at the Seder, we sing the praises of Hashem and speak of his glory and his greatness. And we thank him for bringing us out of golus , from being slaves to being free , from sorrow to happiness. May HaKodesh Baruch Hu bring Moshiach soon and rebuild the Bais HaMikdash quickly and we will all be together again in Eretz Yisroel.


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